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Thursday, February 8, 2007

Hanging Upside Down

I feel as if I'm hanging upside down right now. I've completed the first draft of the earth science portion of our lessons which is 17 lessons in length. I still have to add the activities and games to the schedule and the books I had sitting on the shelf that I didn't reference to be read! No biggie, that stuff is easy to add in.

I still have the astronomy portion to do and I'm trying to decide whether to use A Child's Introduction to the Night Sky as the spine or Usborne's First Encyclopedia of Space. I'm leaning towards using A Child's Intro but I don't want to get too bogged down in our studies and I feel this book is for a little older audience- who knows, it might be perfect! (Eartha Kitt comes to mind when I type perrrrfect, lol)

I have puppy training with a dog that I feel might be a blessing but nonetheless is more responsibility. I'm praying for God to take away the resentment from my thoughts and believe me, it's not just about the new dog. My heart is heavy as I referee between my dog and the new dog. Of course a puppy is more lively and commands more attention, the attention that our older companion would still have if he wanted it. I'm just feeling guilty...

I have a women's retreat in March that I'm being forced to go to- how would you like the church's admin team, your dh's boss' wife and others to gain up on you- of course I could say "no" but not without a lot of discussion and coercion. I want to go, just to get away for a couple of days but I'd rather not go because I won't be able to truly relax. I want to go somewhere, life with only one car is not very enjoyable when you think of all the places you "could" go. I leave the house with our car for a couple of reasons- to go monthly grocery shopping, like I did yesterday; to take Camille to her Dad to visit (4.5 hr roundtrip) and if I "need" it for a particular reason that has to be cleared with my dh's schedule. . . . hanging by my toes . . .

I'm just feeling the stress right now and everything seems magnified. Sylvia's right- like I need another project! All I can do is take it to God and leave it there. Why is that so hard to do at times? I guess I should have put a warning of some type at the beginning of this, sorry if I've ruined anyone's happy thoughts or joyful attitude.

 

3 comments:

Sylvia said...

No need to apologize. It's really difficult to know where one's human limits are and where to draw the line. God doesn't ask more than we can bear, but people sometimes do!

2lilreds said...

Jessica, I SO know how you feel. I've been feeling quite overwhelmed lately - I volunteered to do a lot of things, not knowing that I would be pregnant, and now school is suffering. I'm going to have to back out of a couple of things at church and I know it's not going to be taken well. I can't imagine being a pastor's wife, my friend, and all that carries with it. I had actually considered emailing you to find out how you manage to do it all and NOT feel stressed. You're doing a great job, you know.

Lisa said...

Wow! That is quite a full plate! It seems while reading your posts that each of your days gets a little more organized and little more figured out.. Remember Lamentation 3:22&23, Because of His great love we are not consumed, His mercies are new every morning. I must say from one mom to the next that I too feel like this often. I have a newborn, a three year old who won't go #2 on the potty no matter what I try to do, and a 7 year old that I home school, not to mention the stuff that just comes up. It's nice to know that we all have "those days", and I pray tomorrow brings you refreshment! Good luck and God bless you.